less social anxiety, motivation, and energy to get things done. In turn, these traits in a child result in greater success both in school and at home.
Self-confidence comes naturally for some children (talk of genes and hereditary or just natural gift). For some others kids, building self-esteem requires a lot of effort. And some kids have experiences that can lower their self-esteem.
Whether a child is naturally self-confident or not, what they see, feel, and hear about themselves can erode their self-confidence. Therefore, parents and educators have a huge role to play in helping their kids and pupils grow into confident kids.
Below are some recommended tips on how to help a child build self-confidence.
We also wrote a comprehensive list of some of the useful skills a child should learn here.
How to help my child build self-confidence
1. Encourage kids to try new things
Kids thrive knowing that they can always try their hands at new things and tackle whatever comes their way.
The only way your child can try new things is if you bring them up in an environment that encourages that. Allow your child to learn new skills instead of sticking to what they are already good at. With new a skill comes the confidence to try them out. And isn’t that a good way to boost their self-esteem?
2. Praise your child wisely
Sadly, many parents abuse the use of praise for their kids. They feel that showering praises on their children for any little thing they do will boost their self-confidence.
While it’s okay to let your kids know that they have done well, the best way to help them build self-confidence is to celebrate the efforts they exerted in achieving anything. Tell them you appreciate their resilience, patience, and the hard work they have put in to achieve a certain success.
Raining praises equivocally, and using words like “you’re the best”, and “no one can beat you at it”, you’re doing a fantastic job, would make your child feel that they cannot do better, which is the exact thing you don’t want to happen to them.
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3. Let them practice giving
Giving boosts confidence in kids as it does in adults. Isn’t there a popular saying that there is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving?
Self-confidence and a feeling of self-worth grow when a child gets to see that they can contribute. As little as doing an age-appropriate chore at home, contributing to a service project at church, or helping a sibling at home are all self-confidence-boosting acts of giving for kids.
4. Model self-confidence
Needless to say that children learn more from what they see than what they are told.
Your child doesn’t have to see in you a perfect human being. They need to see the effort you put into your work, the joy with which you serve, and the energy you deploy in meeting your set goals.
Acknowledge the challenges you face, but focus on the possible good results. When your child sees you carry out your tasks with great optimism and enthusiasm, they would want to do the same with their tasks even when they are not feeling up to it and this will help with their confidence quotient.
5. Focus on your child’s strengths
While you encourage your child to learn new skills and take up new challenges, focus on their strengths.
As much as your child has their weaknesses, there have their strengths too. Encourage your child to take up tasks that they enjoy too, but make sure they finish what they started, even when gets a little tough.
When they eventually finish the tasks, they will feel a sense of accomplishment and self-worth which helps build self-confidence over time.
See Also: How to help a child who is struggling to read
6. Let them take some risks
Loving parents try to protect their kids from all possible risks. But in the real world, people have to take some level of risk to be successful at anything. Facing certain risks and coming out of them certainly helps build a child’s self-confidence.
I am not saying you should allow seven-year-olds to go to school by themselves to take risks, but there are age-appropriate endeavours that they can try their hands on.
7. Correct with love
When you scold your child for making a mistake, they not only feel bad, they try as much as possible not to make a mistake or do anything again. This is not what you want for your child.
If a child feels they are not good enough to do anything, they become self-critical. They feel they are not as good as other kids. This will erode any self-confidence they may have.
If you want to help your child develop self-confidence, try to always correct them with love whenever they make a mistake. Avoid harsh criticism.
Let your child know that you love them unconditionally, whether they succeed at a task or not. Let them see a possible reason why they didn’t get the desired result and how they can do better.
Those are some thoughts we wanted to share to help you in building your child’s self-confidence.
How about you, what has worked for your child as you help them become more self-confident? What are some other tips you feel would work? Feel free to share with other parents below.
Other frequently asked questions about how to help a child build self-confidence are?
What causes low self confidence in a child?
There are many causes of low self-confidence in a child. Some of them are unsupportive parents, carers or others that play an influential role in their life, friends who are bad influences, stressful life events such as divorce or moving houses, trauma or abuse, poor performance at school or unrealistic goals, mood disorders such as depression, etc.
What are the signs of low self-esteem in a child?
Some causes of low self-esteem in a child are they have a negative image of themselves - they might feel bad, ugly, unlikeable or stupid, they lack confidence, they find it hard to make and keep friendships, they feel victimizesd, they feel lonely and isolated, and they tend to avoid new things and find change hard.
